Let's talk about Tantric Sex

To many people in the west the terms tantra and sex have become synonymous. If someone uttered the word “tantra” during a word association game, the next word spoken is almost certain to be “sex”.

But I have a confession … I’ve never practiced Tantric sex - at least, not the kind of Tantric sex envisioned by the ancients. So why has someone who claims to practice eco-tantra never had Tantric sex? To understand this apparent contradiction, it is probably worth exploring a little more about how sexual rituals became a part of Tantra in the first place, what they involved, what they are supposed to achieve and how Eco-Tantra offers a modern day alternative.

The first thing that is probably worth pointing out, is that sexual rituals did not form a part of every tantra that was written. In fact, they probably don’t feature in the vast majority. But they were still an undeniable part of ancient tantric practice, and when Abhinavagupta wrote his treatise on Tantra – which amalgamated practices from a variety of sources – he devoted an entire chapter to tantric sexual rituals. To understand the importance of sexual rituals to tantric practitioners though, we really need to consider the tantric philosophy.

In many ways, Tantra evolved as a reaction to the predominant spiritual philosophy of the time, which claimed that spiritual liberation was only possible through extreme asceticism and renunciation. This was a path that was only really available to a few devoted zealots who were able and prepared to live off the charity of others. But the early Tantrikas questioned this so-called wisdom. For them, God was everywhere, and was a part of everything and everybody. From this perspective, to renounce anything was to renounce God; and to deny yourself pleasure was to deny your own divinity.

This is not to say that Tantrikas were hedonists – far from it. The pleasure they spoke of was not something that required stimulation from an external source, because for Tantrikas anything that exists externally (in the macrocosm) also exists internally (in the microcosm). Instead, the Tantras identified a different form of pleasure – an eternal, underlying pleasure; a detached, existential pleasure; a divine pleasure that is present in every single moment of existence. Tantrikas then did not seek out pleasurable experiences, rather, they sought pleasure in all experiences.

Of course, if enlightenment can be achieved through identification with divine pleasure, and divine pleasure underlies all experience, then enlightenment can be (and is) available to everybody. Tantra then, became a populist philosophy, offering spiritual enlightenment to the masses. But it needed to appeal to the masses. And the masses already had their ritualistic forms of worship. So, ancient Tantrikas had a choice: tell the masses they’ve been wrong all along and their lifetime of worship was pointless, or re-interpret existing ritual practice in the light of Tantric philosophy. They chose, of course, the second option.

In general terms, most forms of worship involve supplication to an external deity in return for some form of favour. Within Tantra though, there are no external deities – if some power exists externally, it also exists internally. Everything is God – you are God. And if you are God, what favour are you able to grant yourself that you don’t already possess? From a Tantric perspective the only possible goal is enlightenment – the realisation of your own divinity and recognition of your own enduring universality. And so that is how existing ritualistic worship was re-interpreted – rather than being a supplication for favour, it was the procedural internalisation of a deified aspect of the universal single consciousness (which I’ve been calling “God” for ease of reference). Worshippers were told to identify a deity and then imagine themselves becoming that deity. And within Tantra these deities could be represented as icons, images or sounds because, in reality, they were all merely representations (contractions) of the all-encompassing consciousness of God.

But some rituals also involved sacrifice. These forms of worship urged participants to sacrifice something to an external deity with the expectation of gaining something in return. But from a Tantric perspective, this process seemed almost nonsensical. If God is everything, and you yourself are a form of God, then, in essence, you are giving yourself to yourself to benefit yourself. But there were some rituals that seemed to represent this exact cyclical process – sexual rituals.

Pre-tantric sexual rituals were all about gaining powers. They were designed to appease a swarm of fierce spirits known as yoginis. Yoginis could be summoned through the ritualistic offering of sexual fluids. Once summoned the yoginis would inhabit female devotees and engage in intercourse with their male disciples. Following ejaculation, the men could obtain power directly from their deified consorts by consuming the intermingled sexual fluids directly from ‘the cup’ of the vagina. Because sexual fluids (which in Tantric thought are the physical manifestation of creative energy) were both the offering and the source of power, they could be both sacrificed and consumed. The ritual even involved visualised self-deification.This then, meets all the components of a Tantric sacrificial ritual – a practitioner is able to sacrifice themselves (by emitting sexual fluids) to themselves (by consuming sexual fluids) for their own benefit (self-deification).

So, what’s stopping me from practicing Tantric sex? Well, remember the tantric concept of pleasure? Self-deification and enlightenment (which is the only legitimate purpose of a Tantric sexual ritual) is only achievable if the practitioner is able to concentrate on and become absorbed within the detached existential pleasure that is the essence of divinity. The Tantras are consistent on this point: for sex to be Tantric, there must be no attachment. This means no ego-driven thought constructs, no ideation of the self as a separate individual from your sexual partner, no nostalgia or sentiment, no fear or anxiety, no hopes or expectations for the future.

This is, of course, the same for all Tantric practices. Any experience can be Tantric providing it is done with a meditative awareness on the true essence of divinity and yourself as being a construct of that divinity. But surely this is most difficult during sex. The Tantras certainly saw it this way. For ancient Tantrikas sexual rituals were reserved for the enlightened few who were able to maintain this meditative state even during the most stimulating experiences. Indeed, some tantras advised that the only way this was achievable was to have sex with someone who you didn’t find attractive. The problem with that of course, is that both partners would need to find each other equally repulsive – try keeping the ego out of that conversation!

You see, whilst no-strings sex may be a fantasy for many, it’s rarely a reality. At some level, sex usually involves (or results in) some form of attachment; some form of sexual lust; some form of emotional bonding; some form of anticipation or desire to please. Maybe Tantric sex was more achievable in the ancient culture in which it was devised – or maybe it was equally as complicated then.

But Eco-Tantra may offer a solution. Within Eco-Tantra there is the possibility of another partner - the earth, the environment, the universe itself. So go outdoors, get naked, get sensual, be eco-sexual, be eco-erotic, make love, sacrifice yourself and consume yourself in nature. And if you can introduce a human partner to this equation, if you can experience Tantric sex outdoors, as part of an Eco-Tantric polygamy, then embrace the experience and remember to share it with the community in the forum and the gallery.